


smooches

by PaigeOfSpace



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Canon Temporary Character Death, F/M, Fanon Temporary Character Death, also, because you know. HOMESTUCK, catching feelings, corpsesmooching
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-05 01:50:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12180561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaigeOfSpace/pseuds/PaigeOfSpace
Summary: "CG: BUT IT'S FINE, I GUESS THAT WAS HIS PLAN, LIKE SOME BIZARRE USELESS LAST STAND, EVEN IF HE DIDN'T TELL JADE WHO WAS PRETTY FREAKED OUT UNTIL I TALKED HER THROUGH IT." (Homestuck pg. 3869)[Jade and Karkat talk about corpsesmooching.]





	smooches

**Author's Note:**

> when hussie is a coward and wont give u all the implied jadekat content so u gotta do it urself

\--  gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

GG: KARKAT  
GG: KARKAT DAVE IS DEAD WHAT DO I DO  
GG: FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
CG: WHOA THERE HARLEY. CHILL OUT.  
CG: I WILL TALK YOU THROUGH THIS BUT FIRST YOU NEED TO SIT YOUR ASS DOWN IN THE SNOW AND COOL YOUR JETS.  
GG: I WILL NOT COOL MY JETS!!! MY BEST FRIEND IS DEAD AND I KILLED HIM!!!!!  
GG: theres so much blood oh my god  
GG: this is really really really bad!!! FUCKING FUCKING FUCK!!!!  
CG: HOLY SHIT  
CG: OKAY I CAN SEE THERE'S NO CALMING YOU DOWN RIGHT NOW  
CG: AND TO BE HONEST IF STRIDER HAD UP AND DIED ON ME WITH ZERO WARNING AND IT WAS ALSO PARTIALLY MY FAULT I'D PROBABLY REACT THE SAME WAY  
CG: SO I'M JUST GONNA COME OUT WITH IT  
CG: YOU GOTTA KISS HIM.  
GG: .........  
GG: .....i gotta WHAT!?!?!!???  
CG: YOU GOTTA KISS THAT BOY THIS INSTANT.  
GG: i dont wanna kiss him!!! what the fuck!!!!!!  
CG: JADE, PLEASE. I'M NOT STUPID.  
CG: WELL I AM BUT NOT WHEN IT COMES TO WHO WANTS TO KISS WHO, FOR WHATEVER REASON.  
CG: I'VE SEEN THE WAY YOU LOOK AT HIM, IT'S PRETTY GODDAMN OBVIOUS  
GG: oh my fucking god karkat i meant i dont want to kiss a CORPSE!!!!!!!  
CG: OH.  
CG: I MEAN, YEAH. OF COURSE. FORGET ALL THAT MORONIC STUFF I JUST SAID.  
GG: o_o;  
CG: MOVING ON  
CG: YOU'RE RIGHT, IT'S DISGUSTING BUT IT'S ONE OF THE FEW METHODS OF REVIVING PEOPLE IN THIS GAME  
CG: HE'LL WAKE UP IN HIS DREAMSELF ON DERSE. IT'S LIKE AN EXTRA LIFE  
GG: i guess......  
CG: YOU GOTTA DO IT SOON THOUGH THERE IS A TIME LIMIT ON THIS  
CG: JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES AND TELL YOURSELF THIS THE ONLY THING YOU CAN DO TO SAVE SOMEONE YOU DEEPLY CARE ABOUT  
CG: AND TRY NOT TO THINK ABOUT HOW THE THING YOU'RE DOING IS PLANTING ONE ON THEIR COLD DEAD LIPS  
GG: okay uh  
GG: stand by  
GG: i did it.  
GG: is something else supposed to happen?  
CG: NOPE . HE JUST STAYS DEAD HERE  
CG: TRY CONTACTING HIS DREAMSELF OR ROSE'S  
GG: i will  
GG: ........why kissing do you think?  
CG: WHO THE FUCK KNOWS.  
CG: THIS IS A GAME THAT DESTROYS ENTIRE SPECIES  
CG: MAYBE SKAIA FIGURES MAKING THE REVIVAL ACTION A KISS WILL BE ROMANTIC ENOUGH TO JUMPSTART REPOPULATION  
CG: LIKE THE DEAD PERSON WILL BE SO GRATEFUL TO YOU FOR BRINGING THEM BACK THAT THEY'LL WANT TO START PROCREATING IMMEDIATELY  
GG: uh  
CG: BUT IT'S JUST GROSS AND AWKWARD AND REALLY, REALLY SAD.  
GG: yeah :((((  
GG: .....karkat?  
CG: WHAT  
GG: did you ever have to do what i just did?  
CG: YEAH  
CG: I DID  
GG: what happened? if you dont mind me asking :O  
CG: TWO OF US GOT INTO A FIGHT WITH A BAND OF REALLY STRONG UNDERLINGS  
CG: IN HINDSIGHT IT WAS A FUCKING MIRACLE WE BOTH DIDN'T JUST DIE INSTANTLY  
CG: THOSE THINGS WERE ALL AT LEAST 90% MUSCLEBEAST  
CG: WE RAN AS SOON AS WE REALIZED THAT WE DIDN'T STAND A GRUB'S CHANCE IN HELL BUT BY THEN IT WAS ALREADY TOO LATE  
CG: SHE WAS SERIOUSLY FUCKED UP AND I WASN'T FARING MUCH BETTER  
CG: WE ALL KNEW THE KISSING PROTOCOL AT THAT POINT SO WE AGREED I SHOULD JUST LET HER DIE AND THEN REVIVE HER INSTEAD OF TRYING TO NURSE HER BACK TO HEALTH  
CG: BUT LET ME TELL YOU  
CG: TEALBLOODS TAKE FUCKING FOREVER TO BLEED OUT FOR SOME REASON  
CG: AND WATCHING SOMEONE YOU LOVE SLOWLY DIE IN YOUR ARMS IS NOT FUN.  
GG: oh nooo karkat im so sorry that had to happen to you!!  
CG: IT'S FINE  
CG: I MEAN OBVIOUSLY IT WORKED OUT, SHE'S ALIVE AND CACKLING RIGHT NOW  
GG: dont you mean alive and kicking?  
CG: THAT TOO  
GG: well im glad about that  
CG: YOU ARE  
GG: yes!! she seems like a strange and funny girl and you obviously care about her a lot  
CG: YEAH WELL  
CG: ENOUGH CARING ABOUT PEOPLE AND HAVING EMOTIONS ITS TIME TO GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD  
CG: YOU'VE STILL GOT IMPORTANT SHIT TO DO AND I'LL PROBABLY BE OF MORE USE TO YOU FURTHER AHEAD ON YOUR TIMELINE  
CG: SO IF YOU WANT TO GIVE ME THE NEXT STUPID PASSWORD IN YOUR SADISTIC LITTLE GAME OF MAKING ME JUMP THROUGH HOOPS FOR YOUR AMUSEMENT THAT WOULD BE GREAT  
GG: actually wait karkat!!  
GG: before you go  
GG: that thing you said about me and dave........  
CG: WHAT THING  
GG: karkat im not stupid either!!  
GG: i know youve found me out :P  
CG: RELAX JADE I'M NOT ABOUT TO GO TELL EVERYONE YOU'VE "GOT IT BAD FOR STRIDER" OR WHATEVER THE FUCK, GIVE ME A LITTLE CREDIT  
CG: BESIDES, WE ALL HAVE MUCH BIGGER STABHAPPY DEMONS TO FRY HERE  
GG: thank you  
GG: i know it probably sounds silly but  
GG: if and when the time comes  
GG: i want to tell him myself!!  
CG: THAT'S NOT SILLY.  
GG: :)  
GG: okay you wanted a password right?  
GG: the password is....  
GG: SMOOCHES  
CG: JADE  
CG: ISN'T THAT KIND OF IN POOR TASTE  
GG: omg no!!!!!  
GG: the smooches are for you!  
GG: you were really helpful and kind when i needed you and i appreciate it  
GG: okay ive still got some frogs to catch so ill talk to you later!  
GG: bye <3

\--  gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

"<3"

Karkat stares at the tiny lime green emoticon on the screen. His pump biscuit pounds in his chest. He remembers another kiss, another symbolically-rendered expression of love that resulted from it.

He types a less-than sign followed by a three into Trollian, but before he hits send he thinks about what Jade had said -

"if and when"

He deletes his response, opting instead to scroll ahead on her timeline to find a spot to contact her.

 _You're running out of time for your if-and-when, Harley,_ he thinks.

_We both are._

  
\--  carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling  gardenGnostic [GG] \--

**Author's Note:**

> literally i came up with the headcanon that karkat and terezi's "moment" happened when she was straight-up dying in his arms while i was in the middle of writing this fic, but i think it fits.
> 
> sorry the last paragraph is kinda dumb and shitty but i wanted to make sure the jadekat was VERY CLEAR


End file.
